I have been drifting in an ocean of work. It upsets blog communications. But this is a very good thing. This book is nearly complete. I have the last quarter left of draft one and have experienced a very cool phenomenon as an outline writer — basically, what I’ve heard people speak about and hadn’t had happen — the characters defining the action at some point. And I’ve had to adjust the outline now several times because my original ideas didn’t make sense with the protagonist’s motivations and personality. Fun stuff.
It is a difficult balance for me. The work itself, which I love, and the submission of the work which is tedious spreadsheet biz. And I think one could make a part time job of just submitting writers work for them, you know, if writers had money to pay people for that sort of thing.
I have a short story I need to keep sending out. Five submissions is not a fine effort. And this book has deadlines, the first one missed already for ACFW Genesis. That will have to come next year now.
For me, I struggle to care about the result when I love the process and struggle with process if I focus too much on result. I’ve never been a balanced worker or human. But my wild swings have been their own gift, so I’m not looking to change. So process now. Result later. And I’ll work on where I always need improvement . . . letting go of guilt and worry that I’m not doing enough, never enough, in this short life.