Gender Bending Elementary Kid

photo (2)Yeah, so my son just wore press on nails to school today. I wouldn’t be a mother and a blogger if I didn’t post about it. International Motherhood code = not wanting child to suffer at the hands of the world, or most immediately, other children. So when the boy child — LGBT, future glam rocker, or otherwise — dons the press on nails before school … well, mothers everywhere feel my collective cringe. Never mind that I’m liberal and would equally adore a gay son to a straight one. I do not want that pack of boys he runs with/near to turn on him today and slap a label upon him forever. “Faggot,” “queer,” “gay” or at best, “weirdo.”

But I also know that this moment, this morning, right now, defines my love and acceptance as a mother. So, although the temptation is to prepare him, I can not because that’s judgement. And then there is the temptation for heavy handed teaching. “If they call you gay, ask them what’s wrong with being gay.” I can’t do that either. This is not my fight.

All I could do was mime my very wise and wonderful husband who said, “Those are awesome, dude,” and then sent him off. My heart is certainly not heavy because he’s the next Anderson Cooper or David Bowie. Just heavy because the chance of his friends saying they’re “awesome” is 7% and I won’t see my son for a full 8 hours before I can be the life counselor I signed up to be.

So, today, I wish my gender bender bravery and a strong sense of self.  And, although my heart is heavy, I am proud of his open mind and open trusting heart.


  1. Hey! Found your blog again and I was overjoyed to read this. This Thursday, we’re heading to Disney on Ice. Odds are, my 3 year-old son Sam will want to wear a dress, like his beloved older sister, Eve. I have no problem with this, but I do worry about other less-tolerant peeps who will judge and not ask questions.

    So good for you! I hope the school day was great and the classmates were like “right on!”

  2. How adorable! 🙂 that’s so cute in so many ways. Cause you don’t care what people say! And if people judge, it’s all their problem! Not yours . Plus, there’s nothing wrong about it! I’ve seen so many kids dressed as girls on Halloween, it’s no big deal, I’m with you! Well done!

  3. Rocky, I very much enjoy your writing! You have a very readable style. Keep it up!

Submit a comment